Thursday, October 17, 2013

American Horror Story: Coven 3.02 Review: What's So Great About Eternal Life?

For any that have yet to watch last night’s episode of American Horror Story: Coven, entitled ‘Boy Parts’, I suggest you do so now, or exit this screen immediately. This is not a spoiler free blog. THIS REVIEW MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS! You’ve been warned.
Well, this week’s episode was better than last week, but there still wasn’t much horror to it. Plus, a lot of the storylines are way out there, and all over the place. There’s way too many things going on at once, and it’s just distracting to try and keep track of all of it. If the things all weaved together, I’d give some leeway to them, but there’s really still too much going on.
This week I really enjoyed Lily Rabe’s character, Misty Day. I’m extremely happy she’s not dead, despite being burnt alive. The way she was dressed, and her hair were both fantastic for the character. I absolutely adored her scenes with Taissa Farmiga’s Zoe. It was incredibly sad how much she wanted someone like her around, and that vulnerability came across quite well on screen. I definitely want more of Zoe and Misty in scenes. Also, my favourite moment may have been Misty singing along to Stevie Nixx. That was an amazingly beautiful scene.
Other than her scenes with Misty, the character of Zoe is a little too weak and sniveling. Plus, the black widow power, kind of stupid. But about how weak she is, it’s boring to watch. I don’t want to follow a weepy little blabbermouth like her around, but I absolutely love Taissa Farmiga in this series, so I have a conundrum. Can the writers please give the girl better material to work with?
About the technical stuff in this series, the music for the opening titles is scarier than the actual titles. The first two seasons – despite the second season not being scary – at least had horrifying title sequences. That and the terrible cinematography this season, sometimes it’s completely disorienting, with the upside down shots, and then other times it’s too close-up. In the scene where Madison and Zoe are trying to resurrect Kyle, the scene would’ve been well put together if the camera people had just backed up about a foot or two. So, when splicing the material together, try not to make it so damned difficult to watch. Sure, the last two seasons, scenes would just show up, like bam I’m here, but it’s like they’re purposely trying to distract us from scenes and make us nauseous to watch this series this season. I can’t say any stronger how much I can’t stand it. Sure, it was a bit better than last week, but not nearly as well done as the previous seasons. There’s ten episodes left, get your act together.
Surprisingly, I find myself liking how Emma Roberts plays her character Madison. She seems to be able to play spoiled rich girl quite well, and she’s dangerous to boot. And then Kyle seemed closer to crazy Tate than last week. Maybe it was the hair; it looked a lot like the crazy blonde Tate had. But I seriously hope he doesn’t actually spend six episodes devoid of speech. There are only twelve episodes in a season, and he spoke the first episode, that leaves five more episodes of not talking. Maybe one more would work, but five’s pushing it beyond the realm of intriguing acting techniques.
There are many questions I still have about this series. What was the necessity of throwing Cordelia’s desire to have a child into the mix of an already clogged season of storylines? After about one hundred and eighty years, why didn’t Marie Laveau have more money to show for it? Did Lily Rabe look pregnant to anyone else during the opening scene where she resurrects the crocodiles? Could Zoe be the next Supreme? Wasn’t Queenie’s ancestor the slave that was accused of witchcraft? Wouldn’t that make her a Voodoo witch if that was the same person Laveau was speaking of? And why didn’t the spell call Misty to Madison? Was it just because Zoe was still in the vicinity of where the spell was enacted, or is it because she is the Supreme?
Well, American Horror Story: Coven, you’ve done a smidge better this week, but please work harder next week. Cut the disorienting cinematography, tighten the storylines, and let Kyle speak soon. Those are my suggestions; I implore you to adhere to them.
My rating: 6 out of 10.

Best Lines:
“In this whole wide wicked world, the only thing you have to be afraid of, is me.” – Fiona tells Madison and Zoe.
“I’m sorry for your loss. You want a bite?” – Fiona asks Madame Lalaurie.
“Did we just marry the devil? Because I don’t know if I’m down with that?” – Zoe questions Madison, while they perform the resurrection spell.
“Well, that was a bust.” – Madison remarks after the spell doesn’t work.
“She had the face of a damn hippo.” – Madame Lalaurie remembers her long deceased daughter.

All right, folks, that’s all for tonight. I’ll catch you all tomorrow for reviews of The Crazy Ones, The Vampire Diaries, Once Upon A Time In Wonderland, and Grey’s Anatomy. And hopefully my fifth edition of Best Performances of the Week.

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